Well, yesterday’s post ‘Nothing Really Matters‘ unexpectedly went viral. Tons of feedback from my internet famila, and close people to me. Some were worried for me, and understandably so, and others expressed that finally something to relate with.

It is so easy to talk about positive and uplifting things, but the reality is that we all have our moments of weakness. We all have our moments where we start to feel like we are losing hope. We all have our moments where our mind goes wild with endless negative thoughts. The biggest error that we can all do is bottle all that up, and ignore it just to seem alright and fine. Vulnerability and transparency is not weakness. We are human. We feel. We struggle. We suffer. We cry. Many asked me what was the purpose of your post? To show the danger of keeping to yourself, and not being vulnerable enough to let negative thoughts go.

“Does it really matter to fall in love again with someone after experiencing that?” I asked in myself in my previous post. The simple answer is — YES. The sea is vast, and full of fishes. In the famous words of Dory, “just keep swimming, just keep swimming, just keep swimming.” Then why the long sad description of the breakup? I kept that detail to myself, and it bothered me in doing so, because while I’m 95% over that experience, and that I don’t regret, the remaining 5% was my lack of openness about it that kept the negative thoughts I expressed to roam freely in my mind. It is extremely important that I highlight that during the breakup process neither of us hated, emotionally bashed each other, and spoke wrongly of each other to those around us. We rather cheered each other in our individual walk towards our God-given purpose, and still do to this day. Separation does not mean to hate.

“Do friendships really matter when they aren’t genuine friendships to begin with?” Friendships do matter, but careful to be quick to call someone a friend. We easily call people we just met friends. I remember my freshman year of college; everyone I met day one I called friend. I later learned the hard way that I should’ve never called them a friend. We all want friends. We all want someone to hang out with at times. It is our longing for community that drives that desire for friendship. However, while friendship does matter, the reality is that you will only be able to count the amount of true friends in your life with one hand, and I’m unfortunate enough to do exactly that.

“Does having a conversation with someone really matter?” YES, but just have a conversation that actually matters. That’s wholesome. Encouraging. World changing.

“Does putting yourself out there and being open to meeting someone of the opposite sex really matter anymore?” YES, but know your worth, don’t low ball yourself. If she or he wasn’t interested, then move along. You and I were bought with a big price by the guy upstairs, so she or he needs to be able to afford you.

“Does my college degree really matter? I’m about to graduate, but will there be a job waiting for me?” Ah, every college student’s worry. I hope I get the job that I want with what I wanted to study, but if not, at least I can tell others and myself that I studied something I actually wanted to study. And you know  what… our economy is terrible, but I’m not going to allow any circumstance define my outcome, so neither should you. Working hard does matter.

I confessed that I was depressed, because it is saddening and depressing to see civil discourse, racism, the anger and hated in our society, religious manipulation, etc. Keeping to yourself and drowning yourself with negative thoughts leads to depression, and I’ve been doing exactly that about everything I described in yesterday’s post. “Does it matter to live until natural death?” Without a doubt. God has and will never give up on you, so you should never give up on yourself and to those who love you without measure.

My purpose with yesterday’s post was my attempt of letting go of a lot that I have kept in my mind for some time, so I could focus on thinking about the positive stuff that matter, read Philippians‬ ‭4:7-8. Also, to show the danger of not being vulnerable and open about what’s bothering you, worrying, and hurting you.

Vulnerability is important. Be open and transparent, because it leads to freedom and healing. To lose control is not to go out of control, rather letting go, and letting God. Don’t keep to yourself, because it will lead you to feel as if nothing really matters, when actually everything does matter.

Please take the time to watch the video below:




img_19748 months, six days – so far this year has been quite the up-and-down emotional roller coaster. I usually keep to myself. I don’t talk about any of this with anyone, because quite frankly… I think to myself; the world is up in flames, so what do my feelings and thoughts matter? I don’t want to be judged for sounding over dramatic, but my feelings are my feelings, and I have the right to express myself. I might have hard time opening up in person and expressing myself to my family, friends, and spiritual counselors, but this is my platform, and I feel free to open up, so let me be vulnerable with you, because we just need real people in this world.

I feel weird and almost naked opening up about this…but here go! In the beginning of this year I had a painful and heart-piercing breakup with someone that I truly and genuinely was in-love with. I loved her to the moon and back. (Damn, I’m crying while writing this.)  I invested so much of my time, so much of my emotion, and so much of my physical resources, mainly financial, all because I loved this girl. Before having a car, I would bike 12.8 miles to her house just to see her. If she had a cold, I would do whatever it takes to make her feel better. I remember making her believe she lost her iPod for a week, but in reality, I had taken it just to get the screened repaired to surprise her. I had forgiven her for something that she did knowing that I had strong feelings for her, and while we were in the midst of talking about taking steps towards a relationship; can’t go into detail out of respect, it encouraged my lack of trust in people and hurt me, and forever caused a tendency in me to question and verify anyone before I trust someone. Point is… I did a lot, and without expecting anything in return, because I loved her. A year and a month, but it didn’t work out, because I was the only one in-love, and while I was far from perfect (ladies…  I’m a pain in the ass!) during my relationship, I have to admit a lot of our problems was due to the fact that you can’t be in relationship with yourself. Romance, unconditional love, and passion has to be mutual. After all I invested, I had to come to terms in ending a relationship with someone whom I love greatly, because she wasn’t in-love with me. Does it really matter to fall in love again with someone after experiencing that?

Contemplating suicide is not a joke and extremely selfish, and I’ve actually attempted it during my young teen years, I would be lying if I haven’t thought about it this year. A few times actually. I think my past porn addiction really messed up a few screws in my brain in a few ways, or I could just be manic in my emotions. I’m fine though. However, it’s hard waking up everyday, and not drowning yourself with your thoughts. You start to think about the realities of the world…

No one wants to be your friend unless they have something to gain from you. No calls. No texts. No one genuinely seeks you, until they want something from you. I’m actually questioning a lot my friendships at the moment. Do friendships really matter when they aren’t genuine friendships to begin with?

Conversations are so vague, selfish, and superficial. I have come to accept that no really gives a flying hoot how your day is going, and what your up too. That’s just something to say to fill the awkward silence. I haven’t had a real stimulating conversation with someone in the longest time. Does having a conversation with someone really matter?

Two weeks ago while working out in the gym, a girl randomly started talking to me, we talked, she wanted to hang out, I get her number, and I gave her mine. I texted her during the week, and I invited her for coffee. No response. Does putting yourself out there and being open to meeting someone of the opposite sex really matter anymore? Or is the new norm just talking all the way to the bed for a night?… Seems like that’s what happening a lot around me.

Does my college degree really matter? I’m about to graduate, but will there be a job waiting for me? I can’t even get a job at local gas station, and I have tons of job experience. TONS. All I know is hard work.

What does it matter to work hard, and work your way up the American ladder when it feels like the ladder is getting shorter by the day, and you’ve been dealt a crappy set of playing cards, so no matter how you play your hand, the dealer wins. What does it matter?

The negative thoughts that I allow to ravage my mind depress me. And truthfully, as of lately, I’ve been depressed. I am depressed. And I embrace it, so I could learn and grow from it.

It’s depressing to feel like nothing around you matters anymore.

It’s depressing to know that 3000 unborn babies are killed a day.

It’s depressing to see corrupt cops get away with their actions, and see the good cops get punished by the anger within people. By the way… all lives matter.

It’s depressing to almost consider saying, “you know what… I’m not proud to be American.” The America I was proud of is being eroded with corrupt politicians from both political parties. I echo the words of John Adams in Declaration of Independence, “…But when a long train of abuses and usurpations, pursuing invariably the same Object evinces a design to reduce them under absolute Despotism, it is their right, it is their duty, to throw off such Government, and to provide new Guards for their future security…” My attitude and choice towards this election season is to let this government dissolve and burn itself, and start from scratch.

It’s depressing to know that your faith in a higher power, and belief in Jesus Christ as your Lord and savior is poorly projected by greedy selfish men in the pulpits of today’s church. God weeps in seeing how man has turned His genuine desire to reconnect us with Himself into religious manipulative machines. What does it matter to congregate? And you know what… I understand people’s rejection of believing in a higher power. I wouldn’t believe in any of the gods spoken about in any of the religions today.

Does it matter to live until natural death?

I’m currently 22, and I’m questioning everything in my life. I’m allowing myself to think freely. My conscience and God as my judge. For the purpose to understand myself, and my walk in Christ. These all the thoughts currently roaming my mind. Why share? Because I know I’m not alone in this. I’m here to help you, and you are here to help me. Confusion and anger is rapid among us, and it can easily consume us. I’d be lying if it hasn’t struck me a bit. We’re all tired of being betrayed by everything… media, politicians, corporations, friends, significant others, religions, and our own mind. Nothing seems to really matter right now.

However, while nothing seems to matter right now. I hold to these truths…

My family matters. My purpose matters. My voice matters. You, my audience that I consider my extended family, you all matter. My future wife matters. My future children matter. What matters today is that I choose to love, and live a life of love, because love is all that matters at the end of the day.

(1 Corinthians 13:13)










We live in such a hyper sexualized era, in which, sex is the method of getting our attention. We see it in commercials, magazines, music, television shows, ads, billboards; sex sells. Sex was sold to me at a young age, I was thirteen when I discovered the dark depths of the internet in the world of online porn, which resulted in an addiction that swallowed much of my childhood and teens. I was able to break free with help at the age of 17, but during my first year of college, I guess my history with pornography was my motivation for the things I choose to do in my young adult life. Confession time… the nights after class in the school parking lot with the vulnerable girl from class. The girl that I invited to my college ministry that I attended at the time just to be religious hypocrites afterwards. The girl, in which was my best friend for years;  out of desperateness, resulted in a slippery slope of endless lust and sex, and a false idea of romance. The conclusion? Heartbreak.

Porn is a dangerous drug. It shapes your mind, and warps your understanding of your own sexuality and sex in general. Porn is now even being considered a public health crises. Approximately 20% of all internet pornography is child sexual abuse, and children as young as 11 years old are regularly accessing hardcore pornography. These are unfortunate facts.

Yeah, porn is good…at distorting young children’s minds. Porn was good at making me feel lost in my sexuality. Porn was good at robbing me from having a pure sexual life, because damn, sex is good, no sex is GREAT, but it’s greater when kept within the boundaries of marriage. Porn is a great terrible human invention that has resulted in the sexual desensitization of society that has brought years of individual and collective consequences. So yeah… porn is good.





A lot of us are trying to be something, do something, and be somewhere. A lot of us are trying to be something for someone, and in that process, a lot of us are not being our true selves. Be you, and be happy for yourself. Chase your dreams. Express your thoughts and opinions, and don’t let others suppress them. Don’t modify yourself to fit someone’s idea of you. Fail and succeed. Listen, but also don’t listen to others. Accept advice, but also reject. Do you, and be you, because at the end of the day, it’s just you and God.





It seems like there is a lot of bad news as of lately being slammed into our faces by media networks, and when you are having a bad day, the last thing you want to deal with is more negativity.

It is my goal to find positive and inspirational content that I could post on here. I want my site to be a source of good news for you. So today, while searching for content to post, I found this video. It’s titled “Instructions For A Bad Day.”

Video below:



There are so many things to celebrate in life. For example, this weekend my family and I will be celebrating 25 years of my parents being married. Whether you have something or not to celebrate, make the most out of this weekend, and go celebrate life at least! Life is great, and it’s worth celebrating.

This week’s recap…

Monday: Joy Rides

Tuesday: You can. You will. You did.

Wednesday: Be A Misfit

Thursday: Cooked Documentary





In need of something to watch during your Netflix and chill nights? Well, being a documentary buff, I recently binged on this documentary series called Cooked. I found the series to be very well done and educational, and if you are foodie like me, undoubtedly pleasing to the eye.

The description of the documentary:

“Explored through the lenses of the four natural elements – fire, water, air and earth – COOKED is an enlightening and compelling look at the evolution of what food means to us through the history of food preparation and its universal ability to connect us. Highlighting our primal human need to cook, the series urges a return to the kitchen to reclaim our lost traditions and to forge a deeper, more meaningful connection to the ingredients and cooking techniques that we use to nourish ourselves.”

Western commercialism and the growing dependency of processed food has taken a toll on the intimacy and beauty of home cooked meals, which has resulted in a decrease in the nutritional value of what we eat. And this series really shows us that in a none lecturing way. I recommend watching this documentary series!

Let me know what you think!




I’ve been reflecting on this sermon from Chris Durso all day, so I thought I’d share it with all of you for today’s HDT:

“We live in a Gotham where there are already too many inconsistent heroes. We live in a city where people over promise what they’re willing to do, but catch them on the wrong day, they have already checked out. See, real heroes, real misfits, real Christians, real Christ followers, they don’t pick and choose when they help nor do they allow a circumstance to dictate their level of commitment. We choose to live a life that most people say they don’t want to live. But we know that we’re called to this, and because of His grace we are able to make it. This is why we carry our cross daily, and daily allowing our cross to carry us through. Each and every one of us are called to live a selfless life. Not making it about us, not making it about how many followers we can gain on Twitter or Instagram but making it about how many followers can be added to the Kingdom. Not for our sake, but for the name of Jesus Christ.

I am praying and I am hoping that today you will be consistent in your faith. Please allow me to expose to you from the onset, from the very beginning, if you are doing this thing for applause or accolades then you are in it from the wrong reason. Why? Because the bible clearly states that all glory, all honor, does not belong to us, it all belongs to Jesus Christ. So when you enter in this thing be sure that you know, that you understand, and that you are okay with knowing that all the work may be done by you but all the praise and thank you’s belong to Him.

A misfit is one who’s uncomfortable with his or her surroundings and is seen to be disturbingly different than others. And as misfits one of our greatest discomforts is inconsistency amongst our peers. No matter what happens we remain full of character and integrity without ceasing, without stopping, why? Because we realize that this is more than a fad, or a trendy term, or a t-shirt. This is a lifestyle, and it is a commitment to God. And as misfits living under the mandate of Jesus Christ, we do not take our commitments lightly. Our yes, is yes. And our no, is no.”






“Yes we can,” is the common American chant when striving towards a goal. However, I ask myself… Can we? Do we? Did we? America is full of individuals from all walks of life who have followed their dreams, and have been successful at it.  Are you this person? We all have dreams and goals, but we tend to strive towards them slowly or not at all. STOP IT! You have a dream, go for it! You have goals, complete them. There is nothing that can or will hold you back, except yourself! Think about your current goals in life that you have set for yourself, and tell yourself I can, I will, and once you have completed your goals, you can say I did.

I can.

I will.

I did.